By Nathan Grumdahl, DNP, APRN, PHN, PMHNP-BC
Adolescence is often a challenging stage, both socially and developmentally. For young people exploring questions of gender and sexuality, this period can bring additional unique struggles. These challenges often become more pronounced with the start of the school year. By offering understanding and support, parents can play a vital role in easing the sometimes-stressful transition from summer break and improving their children’s mental health outcomes.
Mental Health Risks for LGBTQ+ Youth
Research shows that rates of depression, anxiety, and suicide tend to be higher among youth who identify as LGBTQ+. In a recent survey from The Trevor Project of over 18,000 young people who are LGBTQ+, some alarming findings included that over 39% had contemplated suicide in the last year and more than one in ten had actually attempted it.
Evidence points to this higher rate of mental health concerns being due to increased experiences of stigmatization. This stigma often includes discrimination, bullying (both in person and online), social rejection, and feeling ostracized from peers, community, and society. Often, these exposures to stigma are internalized and lead to low self-esteem, guilt, anxiety, depression, or feelings of isolation. For LGBTQ+ youth, the frequency and intensity of these experiences may increase with the return to school due to exposure to a larger peer group.
What Parents Can Do to Help
Parents play a key role in protecting the well-being of school-age children who are exploring their identity and gender. They can serve as a protective factor — almost like a “suit of armor” — shielding against some of the challenges their children may face, while also equipping them with helpful tools to thrive.
For many parents, having a child who is exploring their identity and gender can be a difficult experience to process, and they may feel uncertain about how to show up for their children. Resources like this complimentary mental health guide can help. It offers strategies for parents to approach difficult conversations with their children who are exploring their gender and sexuality, and support resources for themselves as well.
Being educated on the unique experiences of LGBTQ+ youth is crucial for parents, as is knowing when to seek greater support from a mental health professional. Recognizing the warning signs of worsening anxiety or depression is the first step. Common signs include:
- Profound dips in mood (tearfulness, sadness, or loss of interest in activities they used to enjoy).
- Behavioral changes such as defiance, emotional outbursts, withdrawal, or low energy.
- Dramatic changes in social dynamics or friend groups, which are often tied to bullying. This can also show up as new episodes of fighting or conflict with other peers that seem intense and out of control.
- Avoidance or extreme anxiety related to school or social gatherings.
- Frequent headaches, stomach aches, or other physical complaints that may present on the morning of school, or the night before, and often lead to the child wanting to stay home.
- Intense fear or worry about school or peers, sometimes linked to social media.
- Significant changes in appetite, sleep, hygiene, or self-care.
If these concerns appear in disruptive or concerning ways, reaching out to a mental health professional for guidance and assessment is an essential first step.
It is worth noting that many barriers to mental health support exist for LGBTQ+ youth. Half of those who responded to the recent survey from The Trevor Project reported that they wanted care for their mental health in the past year but were unable to access it. Parents can help by talking openly with their child about available support and reducing stigma around seeking help. Some available support resources can be found here.
While we cannot shield children from all difficulties in their lives, parental support can be transformative for LGBTQ+ youth. Engaging in conversations about bullying, intimidation, and social dynamics at school helps create a sense of safety. Parents should also check in regularly about their child’s peer relationships, such as who they hang out with and feel safe around, who they may have a hard time with or are afraid of, and who are teachers or administrators in school they trust.
Parents should ask their children about bullying, a common issue for many adolescents. Bullying can come in many forms including cyberbullying, one of the most impactful and negative forms of bullying there is. In addition to openly discussing the topic, parents can help avert cyberbullying by setting reasonable limits on social media. If it occurs, reporting it to school administration is key as this behavior often begins in the classroom and extends beyond the school day, giving the child very little respite.
Schools play an important role in fostering safety and inclusion for all students. According to The Trevor Project survey, nearly half of LGBTQ+ respondents ages 12–17 reported being bullied in the past year, and those who were bullied were significantly more likely to have attempted suicide. Trans and nonbinary students in gender-affirming schools reported lower rates of suicide attempts.
School policies that establish zero tolerance for bullying can help students feel supported when bullying occurs, but a safe school setting should also promote an outward environment that is welcoming and inclusive. Research shows that positive social engagement and community are protective factors for LGBTQ+ youth. Gender and Sexuality Alliances (GSAs) and other LGBTQ+ groups can provide positive support for young people as well as their families.
Using Suicide Prevention Awareness Month as an Opportunity for Conversation
September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month, an opportunity for us to reflect on how we engage in conversations about mental health and suicide, particularly with youth. Parents who have these conversations are sometimes surprised to learn that their child has had suicidal thoughts in the past. For this reason, it is crucial to have these dialogues regularly, speaking calmly and showing unconditional support, especially when we see warning signs.
Parents should always seek professional mental health support if a child expresses suicidal thinking, what is also known as suicidal ideation. If a child shares a plan to end their life or engages in suicidal gestures, immediate action is necessary. While crisis lines can help in some situations, if a child is in immediate danger, calling 911 or taking them to the emergency room is the most appropriate response to ensure their immediate safety.
In sum, recognizing the warning signs of mental health concerns and potential suicidal ideation is crucial for supporting LGBTQ+ youth. While back-to-school season and Suicide Prevention Awareness Month offer opportunities for increased conversations and awareness, support must continue year-round, across the entire span of a young person’s life, day in and day out. With these strategies of support, we can be all be powerful advocates as parents, family, educators, health care professionals, and members of our communities to promote better mental health outcomes for the lives of LGBTQ+ young people.
Originally published on Medium.com