Clinically reviewed by Joshua Stein, MD.
For today’s young people, digital spaces are a way of life. Social media platforms, messaging apps, and online communities offer constant connection, entertainment, and a sense of belonging. But behind the filters and emojis lies a darker reality that threatens the mental health of children, teens, and young adults.
From loss of anonymity to financial cons, young people are at risk of encountering online dangers that have a direct impact on their mental health. With the loneliness pandemic on the rise, it’s vital to understand how real people, and even chatbots, are taking advantage of the online world for their own goals. Young people need to know what may lurk behind a seemingly friendly DM or a new friend request, so they can be well-informed and comfortable getting help, no matter the circumstances.
Read on to learn the dark side of seeking connections online, and how to start a conversation with a loved one to help them stay safe.
Online Relationships Are Increasing, and So Are the Dangers
It’s not uncommon for adults to start relationships or friendships online, but many teens have more online relationships than real-life ones. Pew Research Center reports that 57 percent of teens have friendships that have started online, with 29 percent saying they’ve made more than five friends online. The vast majority never meet IRL. So, although it may seem harmless for a teen to have an online friend to play Fortnite with, not every interaction is positive.
Sparked by the COVID-19 pandemic, teenagers looked to social media and other apps to satisfy their curiosity about forming relationships. Before the pandemic, 1 in 5 children was happy to have an “online-only” romance. And apps have even been created specifically for kids between 13 and 18 years of age to connect and form relationships. Yet data shows online relationships trigger suicidal behavior at higher rates than offline dating does, because the relationship is isolated from parents and peers.
Even if a digital space isn’t intended for meeting new people, any platform can become a dating platform. In these often-unsupervised digital spaces, young people can make poor choices, due in part to immature brain function that keeps them from thinking ahead, coupled with the pressure to belong. For example, in one study, 17 percent of teens 15 and over said they had shared a nude or sexual photo of themselves.
In the wrong hands, personal information can be used as a weapon in the form of cyberbullying, blackmail, or exploitation, and perpetrators can hide behind the shield of false profiles and anonymity. Whether it’s through the guise of a trusted friendship or a promising romantic partner, young people can fall into dangerous relationships and scams that can leave them with a permanent digital footprint and long-lasting mental health challenges.
Why Teens and Young Adults Are Seeking Online Connections
Gen Z and Gen Alpha were raised in digital worlds, and some occupy online spaces more than their real lives. For many youth, the online world can offer positive opportunities, like finding their “people,” if they navigate it safely. But it can also lead them into traps that leave them feeling more alone than ever.
Here are some of the big reasons teens are making more of their connections online.
Accessibility
The average teen uses six types of technology daily, accessing digital spaces with a swipe of a finger or a click of a button. More than any other generation, teens have the highest number of subscriptions, particularly on gaming platforms where they can connect with users worldwide. And 94 percent of teens own a smartphone, their preferred device to consume endless free, short-form content on YouTube, TikTok, and Instagram. Research shows that teens can spend up to 9 hours a day using various products that submerge them into digital communities.
Belonging
Technology can support teens in forming connections that weren’t possible for past generations. Each device and platform has a thriving community that embraces diverse backgrounds, passions, and interests. Whether it’s a TikTok trend that showcases cosplay or a Discord server for girl gamers, online interactions emerge from some form of community that young people feel they can belong to.
Connecting with others who share experiences, interests, and passions, teens feel that they’re not alone. For example, young people with chronic illness and disabilities can thrive without worrying about physical limitations, coordinating support, or feeling like the “other.” There are rich communities focused on supporting one another, such as resource-based Instagram accounts for mobility aid hacks and health-based resources sourced from the community itself, such as The Mighty.
For LGBTQ+ youth, online communities can be a lifeline, serving as a safe and welcoming space to explore their queer identity. On average, 48% of gay and bisexual people recognize their queer identity by high school, yet 1 in 2 LGBTQ+ teenagers are bullied at school. It’s no wonder that queer youth overwhelmingly find online affirming spaces as the most accessible option for support, according to The Trevor Project.
Curiosity
It’s typical for teens to start exploring romantic relationships. And the online world offers an easy place to do that. For teens who are shy or have social anxiety, connecting with others online can make them feel more confident and bolder, breaking down a barrier they may have in person.
In the online world, teens can practice forming connections, caring for another person, and sharing interests that mean something to them. Although face-to-face interactions are better, for some young people, digital interactions can pave the way to forming new friends or a romantic relationship.
Online Dangers for Teens and Young Adults
Across many digital spaces, young people are vulnerable to human and digital threats. We break down some of the top online dangers users can encounter in the digital world.
Catfishing
A “catfish” creates a fake online persona to deceive others. Often, their goal is to form a trusting friendship or romantic relationship, as a way to steal someone’s identity, lure them to share explicit content, or try to get money from them.
Along with the very real dangers young people face in these situations, they are also more vulnerable than older people to the emotional distress that can come from getting catfished, including feelings of betrayal, mistrust, and poor self-esteem. One study found that victims of catfishing experience strong feelings of self-blame, anger, and stupidity. In this same study, once the relationship was revealed as fake, many victims compared it to grieving a death. This storm of complicated emotions can lead to shame and isolation that is directly correlated to depression.
The Rise of “Sextortion”
Financial sextortion, a form of catfishing, is rising among youth at alarming rates. The most common way sextortion begins is a perpetrator skillfully navigates a chat, posing as a peer, to obtain explicit media and use it as a threat to get the victim to send money or more sexually based media. Teenage boys between the ages of 14 and 17 are at the highest risk for this type of exploitation, but any young person can be a victim.
The psychological toll on victims is severe, including low self-esteem, depression, paranoia, and anxiety. Many feel trapped and hopeless, with 45% of youth saying they didn’t feel comfortable confiding in an adult. And the FBI showed over 13,000 reports of online financial sextortion of minors from October 2021 to March 2023. Tragically, of those reports, more than 20 youth involved died by suicide because they felt like there was no way out of the harassment they were experiencing. In a series of interviews with parents of teen sextortion victims, their loved ones died by suicide within 24 hours of being threatened. Often, the window can be shorter, with one teen, Braden Markus, dying by suicide less than 30 minutes later after sending nude photos to a predator posing as a teen girl.
Deep Fakes
Deepfakes are AI-generated videos, images, or audio recordings that mimic a person’s appearance or voice, often without their knowledge or consent. While this technology poses risks across all age groups, girls and young women are particularly vulnerable.
A report by The New York Times highlighted a disturbing trend: the creation and circulation of deepfake nudes in middle and high schools, with girls aged 13–18 disproportionately targeted. Using AI tools, some teens—most often boys—generate fake explicit images of their female classmates, inserting real faces onto fabricated bodies, then shared on social media and among peers.
The consequences for the victims go far beyond embarrassment. Research found that 84% of teens believe deepfake nudes are harmful, citing emotional trauma (30%), reputational damage (29%), and deception (26%) as their main concerns. Some develop trust issues, withdraw from social life, or transfer schools due to harassment. In severe cases, victims report symptoms consistent with PTSD. The impact on self-esteem is profound, especially during adolescence, a critical time for identity and body image development.
Generative AI and Chatbots
Generative AI has the potential to slow teens’ cognitive development, by taking on tasks related to problem-solving, time management, and more. In a survey, over half of young people ages 14–22 reported using generative AI, and many admitted using it to cheat on assignments, homework, or tests. AI has contributed to massive amounts of online misinformation, including altered pictures, fake articles, and generated audio.
Plus, studies show AI advances stereotypes and falsehoods based on the collective information it pulls content from. Although it’s great that more young people are using chatbots to seek answers to questions they might be too embarrassed to ask, such as questions about sexual health, AI can make errors, give harmful advice, and oversimplify serious symptoms. Our psychiatrist, Brent Nelson, MD, warns about the dangers of using AI for mental health, referencing a tool that was taken down after giving poor advice to people with disordered eating.
Digital ‘Friends’
Powered by AI machine learning and human-like conversations, chatbots can have personal and realistic conversations that lead some young users to believe they’re in a relationship. Over 100 AI companions are available with a wide variety of topics, from fitness coaches to sexually explicit conversations.
Some reports say young people are using them for hours daily, leading to a range of issues, including dangerous advice, dependency, and an unhealthy concept of relationships. And research shows teens with depression, anxiety, or social challenges can suffer more problematic consequences, like the 14-year-old boy who became obsessed with his role-playing chatbot before his death.
Cyberbullying
Similar to bullying in person, cyberbullying involves online influence to intimidate a perceived weaker person. Cyberbullying can include sending harmful or false content about something personal to another teen with the goal of humiliation. This could involve starting rumors online, messaging threats, or posting personal information.
Pew Research Center found that 46 percent of US teens have been cyberbullied. One-third of teens have been called an offensive name online, and 31 percent have experienced harassment based on their physical appearance, and 7 percent have had their images shared without their consent.
Since cyberbullying frequently happens outside the purview of parents and teachers, these actions can run rampant and increase the likelihood of mental health disorders. In fact, 93 percent of victims report poor mental health, and 66 percent of female victims have feelings of powerlessness. Studies have also found that cyberbullying has more social and emotional effects than traditional bullying.
Young People Who Are at a Higher Risk
Teens and young adults are already at a higher risk for online encounters due to their incomplete brain development, their access to technology, and the pressure to belong that’s typical for this stage of life. However, certain populations may struggle more as a result of a limited ability to connect in real life, a less-informed support system, or barriers outside their control.
Some of the most vulnerable youth who are most at risk of developing unhealthy online interactions include youth who:
- Have learning or mental health difficulties
- Are or were in the foster care system
- Have been victims of abuse
- Are children of parents with less education or internet experience
- Belong to marginalized groups, such as LGBTQ+ individuals or youth with disabilities
Young people with disabilities may experience some of the most significant benefits of seeking connection online due to physical limitations, poor community accommodations, and existing stigma from non-disabled peers. Yet, one study suggests the dangers are much higher for this group, because they may have fewer skills in digital resilience. This means it can be harder for some young people with disabilities to recognize, manage, and recover from risky online encounters such as bullying, sexual media, and misinformation.
6 Tips for Keeping Teens Safe Online
Because occupying online spaces is often a solo activity, many teens keep their interactions to themselves, even if they cause them emotional pain, confusion, and even IRL dangers. Thus, parents of teens need to take proactive precautions, start open-minded conversations, and focus on ensuring a trusting relationship that allows teens to come to them for support.
Here are a few actions for keeping teens safe online, offered by Internet Matters, a leader in child safety guidelines:
Stay involved: Have open conversations about the digital spaces young people occupy and their interests. Don’t be afraid to discuss seemingly awkward conversations like pornography or cyberbullying. The more open you are, the more comfortable they will feel coming to you for support. It may seem weird at first, but bringing it up gives a young person permission to come to you in the future.
Talk about online reputation: Share that anything they post online can stay in these spaces forever. This isn’t meant to scare them, but to encourage them to be thoughtful about what they’re posting. Invoke the “grandma rule”—not posting anything you wouldn’t want your grandma to see.
Keep their information private: Pew Research Center reports that 92 percent of teens on social media share their real name, 71 percent post the name of their school, and 71 percent post the city or town they live in. Help your child adjust their settings to protect their profiles, tagged media, and posts. Explain that some information, such as location or contacts, should not be shared because it can be used to target them or even introduce real-life issues.
Teach them not to give in: Remind them to never give in to peer pressure, especially when they’re feeling uncomfortable. There are apps, such as Send This Instead, that help children pivot conversations instead of sexting or sending sexual media.
Explain proper online etiquette: Discuss what being responsible looks like online, especially when interacting with others. Explain that you should show respect to another person like you would IRL and that a screen doesn’t hide who they are.
Show you trust them: After multiple productive conversations with your loved one, it’s time to give them some space to explore the online world. Once you agree on the guidelines, give them a realistic time allowance to explore. Continue to check in to see how it’s going.
These actions and talking points can lay the foundation for your loved one to be an informed and thoughtful digital citizen who also has your support when needed. Unfortunately, digital influences can always affect us even when we don’t realize it, so it’s vital to know when to reach out to a professional for additional guidance.
When to Get Help
It’s not always obvious when a teen or young adult is experiencing difficult situations online. However, subtle behavioral changes may occur in their interactions with their devices, messages, and apps, and you may also notice red flags outside their device use. Here are a few signs to watch for:
- Scrolling on their phone constantly and struggling when separated from devices
- Sudden mood changes after reading a message
- Avoiding certain apps or devices
- Excessive worrying, fear, or anxiety
- Changes in sleep and/or appetite
- Seeming “flat,” displaying less interest or emotions than usual
- Extreme or uncharacteristic irritability or anger
- Avoiding friends, family, or social activities
- Having unexplained health problems like headaches or stomach issues
- Significant changes in school performance, interests, hobbies, or friends
No matter what, if something feels off or you have a gut feeling that your child or a loved one is struggling, offer unconditional love and support. Know that starting a conversation and connecting them with help as soon as possible can prevent lifelong mental health challenges, poor relationship choices, and even loss of life.
Your Teen and Young Adult Mental Health Experts in Minnesota
At PrairieCare, we provide a full continuum of mental health services for teenagers and young adults to heal and thrive. Our team of experts understands young people’s complexities and creates a comprehensive treatment plan to help them cope and build lifelong resilience. From managing screen time to promoting a positive body image, every patient receives individualized care for their unique life experience.
Get started by calling our team at 952-826-8475 or learning more about our admissions process here. Our experts are here to guide you so you can focus on healing. No matter what, you will leave that first conversation with concrete next steps for finding the appropriate care.
You can also request a no-cost mental health screening by clicking the button below and filling out the form on the right. Our team will then contact you within one business day to get started.
